I honestly don’t even quite know what to make of this, so we’ll just tackle it together.

HelloFresh just posted one of the strangest “Gay Pride Month” posts I have ever seen.

Strangest and most disgusting.

Take a look:

Closer look here:

And yes, it’s real, I confirmed it myself by going directly to their Instagram.

See here:

So….now let’s try and breakdown what the heck it even means?

Full text again right here:

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OFFICIAL STATEMENT

We know eating isn’t always a top priority this month.

We respect that.

But for those of you who are… prepping… we have an extensive lineup of high-fiber recipes available.

Happy Pride.

This is like decoding a foreign language….

Ok, starting with eating isn’t always a top priority this month.

Wait, what?

Why?

Eating?

You mean like sustenance to stay alive?

That’s not a top priority?

Ohhhh, I get it….these degenerates are so busy having anal sex with each other they get so busy they forget to eat?

Is that the message?

Is that SERIOUSLY the message?

And good to know you “respect that”.

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I’m not sure why anyone would respect that, but ok.

Then we get into the people who are “prepping” and for them you have high fiber foods.

Ok, let’s decode that one….high fiber notoriously cleans out your bowels so, I guess it’s just the same thing again?

Eat a ton of fiber so you “prep” and clear out your anus for all the anal sex?

That’s the message again?

And of course the tagline: “Happy Pride.”

This isn’t even depravity anymore, this is just downright sick and demented and doesn’t even make much sense.

This lady says she’s a lesbian and it even disgusts her:

Too much indeed.

Too LOONEY.

These people have literally lost their minds.

The world truly is going to hell in a hand-basket because in related news Tom Brady just launched a pornographic sports drink today.

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In case you missed that one:

JUST IN: Tom Brady Launches Pornographic New Sports Drink

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Well, this is a headline I did not expect to write this today….or ever.

Tom Brady has officially launched a pornographic new sports drink called “Good Nut”.

Yes, it’s real.

And before you start saying “Oh come on Noah, you’re seeing ghosts, get your mind out of the gutter!” it’s not my imagination.

They even tagged it with the slogan: “It’s a delicious mouthful.”

Which of course immediately reminded me of Tobias and Bob Loblaw:

Anyway, it’s real.

Watch here to see it for yourself:

Is this even real life anymore?

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We really did split off onto a different timeline didn’t we?

Fox Business had more details on the new launch:

Legendary NFL quarterback Tom Brady’s latest business venture is hitting the beverage shelves in a market expected to reach $11 billion by 2030.

Brady, as part of his latest partnership expansion with Gopuff, announced the launch of Good Nut, a premium line of organic coconut water, on Monday.

With consumers conscious of seeking less processed, lower-sugar beverages today, the market for coconut water continues to rise. Gopuff, the instant commerce leader, identified that customers were buying coconut water, with sales surging at 115% year-over-year on its platform.

As a result, Brady and Gopuff are capitalizing on the shift.

“Gopuff has a unique ability to understand what consumers want and get great products into their hands in minutes,” Brady said in an exclusive statement to Fox Business. “We had a great experience working together on GOAT Gummies, and that trust made it easy to team up again on Good Nut. From product development to launch, we’ve been aligned on creating something Gopuff customers would actually want to drink.”

Brady has always been one to think about everything that goes into his body, making coconut water something he aligned with quickly. In fact, the idea began because chocolate coconut water is a staple in the Brady household.

“It’s something I’ve enjoyed for years, and hydration has always been an important part of my routine, during my playing career and still today,” he said.

“Hydration has always been a big part of my routine, and while coconut water has been a staple for me, I knew we could take it to a completely different level by teaming up with Gopuff. With Good Nut, we focused on keeping the ingredients simple and clean, making sure it’s exactly what I’d want in my own fridge.”

Good Nut uses organic Vietnamese coconuts, delivering a clean, refreshing hydration experience in its 11.8-ounce can. And it also comes in three variations – original, chocolate and sparkling.

“We quickly realized there was an opportunity to shake up the category with a product that tastes incredible, uses great ingredients, and has a bold brand that gets people talking,” Tyler Stewart, head of marketing at Gopuff, said in a statement. “Blending premium products with brands that are playful, unexpected, and don’t take themselves too seriously has become a huge part of how we build together with Tom.

“Whether it’s GOAT Gummies, our lobbying campaign with Super Monday Off, or now Good Nut, we’re always trying to give our customers and fans more of what they want, and of course entertain them a little along the way.”

This is a Guest Post from our friends over at WLTReport. View the original article here.

 

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